Most women need to build up lovemaking slowly before intercourse get in the mood. Hurrying spoils things and makes it less fun for guys as well.
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When Nakshatra goes out for a coffee with his mother, they’re both on the look-out for cute men. “Do you fancy that guy?” she’ll say.
Things haven’t always been this way. Growing up in a village, he became aware of his feelings aged 16. A year later, after a move to Mumbai, he told his parents he was gay. His mum said she wished he was dead.
Q: A friend’s relative molested me. I feel ashamed and guilty and don’t know what to do. Palak (15), Faridabad
Auntyji says... Palak puttar, I am giving you the tightest jhaapi ever. Your aunty is so saddened to hear that you had to go through this. It’s tough and unfortunately you’re by no means the only one in this situation.
A friend of mine hooked up with a guy for the first time recently. He was nice and cute and all that, but he refused to put on a condom.
“It was so damn awkward. All the foreplay was done and I said, ‘Come on, why don’t you wear a condom?’ And he refused to,” my friend told me. That’s a tight situation. What did she do?
“I don’t like the term ‘SMS stalked’, it sounds very unserious,” says Bangalore student Tara.
“It makes me feel like whatever I went through was locked into my little phone or something. Like it didn’t spill into my real life.” She was stalked by her own boyfriend. It was her first relationship ever, and someone she really liked. But she ended up living in fear.
Mansi was stalked by her ex-boyfriend for nearly a year. It almost destroyed her life, the 24-year-old event manager says.
He seemed like a nice guy. But Mansi ended up trapped in her home, a nervous wreck. She didn’t dare ask her parents for help, too scared to confess she’d had a boyfriend. Mansi now thinks stalking should be considered a crime.
When Vivek, 22, went to a camp organised by Mumbai campaign group Men Against Violence and Abuse, it changed his life.
The boys went expecting games - but not the kind they got. They were paired off. One was told he was in charge. For 15 minutes he could command the other to do anything. “Go get me food. Switch off the fan. Now switch it on.”
For the next 16 days, Love Matters is blogging! We've joined the OneVoice campaign against gender based violence and the Men Say No blogathon. The goal? To get people thinking and acting to end violence wherever it happens.
Our first blog is about how gender violence (in this case 'eve-teasing') can turn a simple thing like getting dressed in the morning into a nightmare.
HarassMap, a campaign group battling Egypt’s street sexual harassment plague, has celebrated the Eid holiday with the launch of a new short SMS number for women to report hasslers and gropers.
The reports show up on a map on the group’s website, exposing Egypt’s harassment hotspots. “The key to stopping sexual harassment is in the hands of each of us,” HarassMap says.
“I’ll hit you with a sandal” – Chappal Maarungi in Hindi – is a radical Mumbai campaign to deal with ‘eve teasing’, or street sexual harassment.
It’s the brainchild of five media students, who developed the idea as part of their syllabus. Following a big response in local media and on social networking sites – 600 Facebook likes in a fortnight – Chappal Maarungi now aims to spread to other cities.
The Delhi ‘SlutWalk’ is finally set for 31 July. But the name has been changed to Besharmi Morcha – ‘Shameless Front’.
There was criticism that the global movement and the word 'slut' aren't right for India. "Here girls are more often called ‘shameless’ for wearing certain clothes or following a certain lifestyle, or even for just talking to boys,” says organiser Umang Sabharwal.
‘Real men respect women.’ ‘Share, don’t stare.’ The flash mob use t-shirt slogans to get across their anti-harassment message.
Please Mend the Gap is a campaign for gender equality in Delhi’s public spaces. “It’s about making people aware that eve teasing, staring, and being disrespectful to women is not acceptable,” says organiser Malini Kochupillai.
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