“My guy and I had to find safe spots to have sex. There was no privacy at home so we had to venture outside,” Priya says.

Like many Indian couples, Priya and her boyfriend made love in parks and other deserted spots because both lived with their parents in Mumbai and didn’t have their own rooms at home. “What else could we have done,” she asks.

Twelve stories you liked best in 2012!
#11 First published 04/04/2012

Priya is a 25-year-old student of Communication Science in Mumbai

Living with family
My family lives in the suburbs of Mumbai. We are four of us – my dad, mom, sister and me. And we live in a small two-bedroom apartment. I share a room with my sister, and my parents have their own bedroom. So while I was growing up, I never had any private space.

On top of that, my mom is a house wife, so she would always be home. Like a typical Indian mother, she also believed in keeping an eye on what her daughters were up to. Checking that we weren’t ‘going astray.’ I couldn’t have imagined bringing my guy home to have sex.

Safe sex spots
So we began scouting for safe spots to have sex outside. We’d find deserted railway stations sometimes. Or we’d go to some hills in the neighbourhood especially during the rains, because nobody would be there. And sometimes we’d just park the bike somewhere convenient and do it on the bike.

Boy, was it thrilling! But it was also stressful. We were always afraid of someone spotting us and threatening us. Public display of affection can be penalised under some obscenity law in India. So we were always wary of cops in public places. They are often looking for easy money and it’s plain harassment to be caught while making love.

Awkward moments
We also had some very awkward moments. Once, we were ‘caught in the act’ by some colleagues. And for almost a month, I couldn’t face them. I don’t know why something even as innocent as kissing or holding hands is considered forbidden. And with sex, everybody does it, then why should we be ashamed of it?

It’s been a while since I made love in public spots. My current boyfriend has a place for himself now and we enjoy enough privacy. I look back at those days as a phase I had to pass through. As something I had to grow up with and now have grown out of. Though I wish I had more comfort to express love in those days, I miss the thrill sometimes!
 

By Gayatri Parameswaran
Photo: nathancolquhoun under CC licence