LOVE MATTERS IS A WEBSITE ABOUT LOVE, SEX, RELATIONSHIPS AND EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN. IT IS PRODUCED BY RADIO NETHERLANDS WORLDWIDE.

Love and Sex Info

my story

Fantasising about my girlfriend’s best friend

Fantasising about my girlfriend's best friend“I’ve never felt so guilty in my life,” says Anmol. He’s been with his girlfriend for two years but lately he’s found himself fantasising about her best friend.

“I don’t want to mess up my relationship over something like this but I really don't know how to get her friend out of my mind,” says Anmol. “I’m turned on every time I’m around her.”


Sexting: knowing the risks

Sexting: knowing the risks“I take sexy pictures to show myself off,” says a girl in a Chilean TV report. “It’s a great way to boost your ego,” a 15-year-old girl adds.

Texting sexy messages or photos can spice up a relationship or keep a long-distance love affair on the boil. But it can be risky. The raunchy photos you send winging into cyberspace might come back to haunt you.

More on
sexting

More on
sex and the internet

Sexting – or sexy texting – can mean exchanging erotic SMS messages, but also photos or videos.

Even if sexters don’t bare all, they can still be putting themselves at risk, says Jorge Flores Fernandez, founder of FriendlyScreens.com, a Spanish initiative to promote cyber safety for young people.

Sexting probably started about a decade ago with couples sending each other erotic SMS messages. But now it’s also possible to send high quality photos and films, and a growing number of young people are free and easy sharing sexy pictures of themselves.

Suicide
It can be a risky business, says Flores, who researches social networking and works on improving awareness among young people in the use of sexting.

Take the infamous case of Jessy Logan, Flores says. The young American girl had given her boyfriend a semi-nude photograph. But when the relationship ended, the boy sent Jessy’s image by mobile phone to all his classmates. A few days later Jessy committed suicide.

“From the very moment a picture is published on a digital device, even your own, it can appear somewhere else at any time, because you lose the device, because of a joke by a classmate, by mistake, by carelessness or by robbery,” Flores says. “So from that moment on, the image that was in theory only in one place becomes unrecoverable”.

And the real problems start if someone deliberately decides to use the images as a way to harass their owner, he adds.

Paedophiles
There’s also a legal issue with under-age teens sharing nude photos of themselves, Flores says.

“Anyone who produces an image of a naked minor is producing child pornography. The owner and the distributor of the image are at fault.” What’s more, the photos could end up in the hands of paedophiles.

Tips
Flores has some key advice on dealing with the risks of sexting:

  • Think seriously about the consequences of taking revealing pictures of yourself, or letting someone else take them.
  • Remember that anything uploaded on a digital device can be published at any time.
  • Life is long and nothing is forever: a close friend you trust can one day get mad at you and in a rage do something he or she later regrets.
  • Stand up to bullying. If someone is trying to blackmail you by threatening to spread compromising photos of you, don’t keep it to yourself. Blackmail is a criminal offence. Bite the bullet and ask for help – from your parents or someone you trust. Never give in to blackmail, because you could just make matters worse.

     
    Photo: deviantart / Sexting by crunkgirl

     

     
    Sexting - do you do it? Is it worth the risk?

     

blog

Hey there, I recently began writing a blog about my experiences with dating and finding love. It tends to be more about sex than anything else. ha. Anyway, just stopping by to let you know that your blog has been really interesting to read. Thanks for a good post about sexting.

Blog

Thanks for your comments - and your site suggestion. Unfortunately we can't post links to paid sites. Glad you liked the blog though! Feel free to send us some blog samples you're working on. 

RNW - News and analysis from the Netherlands in 10 languages, worldwide 24/7 on radio, television and online